Let’s address the elephant in the room. No, not the one lurking at the family braai asking when you’re getting married. The real one: burnout.
More and more men are quietly cracking under the pressure of being “always on.” We’re climbing corporate ladders, chasing ambitions, hustling like we’re indebted to the mafia. But beneath the tailored suits, the Sunday league soccer boots and the car repayment plans… we’re exhausted.
According to the World Health Organisation, an estimated 3.8% of the global population experiences depression. Among adults, that’s 4% of men and 6% of women. When you take these numbers into account, it’s clear that something has to be done. Looking after your mental health isn’t a luxury. It’s oxygen.
Let’s unpack what’s really going on.
The “Always On” Myth
The truth is, rest has become suspicious. If you’re not grinding a side hustle, studying for your third postgrad or applying for your next opportunity at 2am, are you even trying?
We’ve become victims of our own ambition. Taking a nap feels like cheating. Watching your favourite show instead of a webinar? Treason. We’ve mistaken burnout for brilliance and hyper-productivity for success.
READ MORE: “I Didn’t Think I’d Make It”—Men Who Survived by Speaking Out
But just because your calendar is full doesn’t mean your mind and body don’t need a reset. According to the Mental State of the World Report (2024), South Africa ranks 69 out of 71 countries in mental health, with 35% of respondents classified as distressed or struggling. That’s the highest percentage globally.
When even your hobbies come with Google Calendar invites and invoices, something’s got to give. We’re burning daylight, midnight oil and what’s left of our patience all in the name of “building.” But to build anything sustainable, you need a strong foundation – and that includes your wellbeing.
Popular podcaster and author Jay Shetty emphasises the importance of mental wellbeing in managing fear, stress and anxiety. Mindful efforts to protect your peace can change your life.
The Male Mental Load
The unspoken pressure of being a “real man.” Provide. Perform. Protect. Never pause.
Whether said out loud or not, there’s a heavy expectation placed on men to be financially stable, emotionally composed, physically fit and professionally successful – often all at once. It’s the kind of pressure that leads to sleepless nights, short tempers and quiet moments of self-doubt. It’s also why so many men suffer in silence.
READ MORE: Depression Symptoms for Men, According to Therapists
According to the National Planning Commission’s 2024 Mental Health Situational Analysis, depression and anxiety remain the most common mental health challenges in South Africa. Learning to manage stress and anxiety may help men lead happier, healthier lives.
Rest, Bafethu: Reclaiming Joy Without Guilt
Men deserve a break. Let’s normalise healthy habits – soft Sundays with your favourite music, regular gym sessions, reflective walks with no destination or even journaling your fears and dreams.
The more aware we are of the weight we carry, the easier it becomes to lighten the load. Sometimes you have to turn your phone off without guilt. Say “I can’t make it” not because you’re busy, but because you’re tired. Get a full night’s sleep. Set boundaries. Protect your peace.
It’s also important to find communities that inspire growth and hold us accountable. Men need each other. We need friends who check in and ask “How are you feeling?” – not just “How’s work?” We need space to speak freely and be vulnerable.
READ MORE: Mind Meals: How These 13 Foods Impact Stress, Anxiety & More
5 Ways to Start Training for Balance
- Daily pauses: Take 10–15 minutes of quiet time to reset
- Journaling: Writing down your thoughts helps clear your head
- Therapy: Speaking to a professional is a step forward, not a weakness
- Boundaries: Say no to what drains you – and mean it
- Joy without purpose: Do something just because it makes you feel good
Every day doesn’t have to feel like a World Cup final. We are not our pay cheques, productivity levels or last big wins. We’re human beings who deserve rest, joy, support and softness. Train for balance. Redefine success. And most importantly – rest, bafethu. You’ve earned it.
Meet Usher Takudzwa Nyambi
Is a cultural consultant, editor, speaker, and project manager with a global footprint spanning over 20 countries. A graduate in International Relations from Africa University, his work has appeared in Rolling Stone Africa, BBC 1Xtra, GQ and more. He has spoken at the Harare International Literature Festival, Wits and the British Council’s Creative Hustles Program. Usher has also interned at UNFPA and IFAD, contributing to key editorial projects. A passionate advocate for African narratives, education, and youth development, he is a proud member of Forbes BLK, championing the power of storytelling across the continent.
